My son is 7 1/2. He is sweet, smart, funny and sometimes acts like a turkey. (not the animal) He blows me away with his retention of pretty much anything with numbers and chapters of books. He has loved math since he was about 3. He started reading around the same time. He loves his sister more than anything. Even though he questioned it, he believed my answer about the tooth fairy being real. He still loves to snuggle up with me at night. He just took up chess and asks NL husband to play every single day. And he does. And sometimes C. wins. He still sleeps with his "Bear" that he's had since he was a baby.
One thing he is not, though, is a good eater. He is what some might call "picky", although NL husband and I know it is nowhere near picky. I'd take picky ANY day over his "food issues". He, since about the age of 2, will not eat pretty much anything. He will eat: apples, pears, bananas, strawberries, pancakes, toast with butter (not too brown of the toast and butter must be melted), hot dogs (NOT grilled or on a bun), chicken nuggets, cheese sticks, yogurt tubes (but only Yoplait), buttered noodles, crackers. That's it. Also, he will not eat food at anyones house. He may, MAY, eat at our families homes, but it will be Wheat Thins or Cheez its.
It is exhausting some days. Most days I feel like a failure and it is somehow my fault. The boy hasn't eaten a vegetable in over 5 years. He seems to be growing and he's not a skeleton, but it's exhausting. It used to be containable.....then we started having to take him to restaurants. Then family functions. Most family members are super, super nice and will bend over backwards to get him something, anything, to eat. But you just don't want to have to have family, or anyone for that matter, go through so much for food. It's not an allergy. It's not that other food makes him ill. He's just.....well.....he's just that way.
And sometimes on the rare occasion that I/he/we are questioned on it, the other person will say something along the lines of, "Yes, our son/daughter is picky, too! He will only try 2 bites of everything on his plate every night and he/she makes a big deal about it." Ok, maybe that's a little exaggerated. But, my point is that he won't even do that. I think people really think he's just "picky" and that it's us, not him.
And I have done the whole "you cannot leave the table until you've XXXX (tried everything, taken a bite of a vegetable, finished everything" and believe me....that boy will sit. it. out. No joke.
The reason I'm writing all this (other than hoping there are others out there with me) is that I just had to email another mom about a potential playdate this week. Her boy is 7 also. Last time he came over here and had dinner......now it's our turn. I am dying a little inside. I'm worried how it will go over there. What will he say? What will he do? Will they think it's us, too?? I started to write this long winded email to her (long winded like this post) and then I just stopped. I reread it and realized how ridiculous I sounded. Why am I making such a big deal about food?? I erased the whole thing and just wrote, "Sounds great! How about Wednesday."
Was that the right thing??
Yes it was.
ReplyDeleteAll you need to do is tell him he doesn't need to eat, but he needs to be polite about his refusal.
Then, when you drop him off, let the other mom know he may or may not eat ("he might not be hungry" works well), so that she doesn't feel like she has to force the issue.
That's all.
And, no worries. It'll be ok. :D